I recently offered a workshop: Self Healing through Yoga. Two weeks before the workshop, I got extremely stressed. At one point, I realized what I was doing. I caught my “ego mental voice” worrying about being successful rather than listening to my heart which was clearly saying, “I trust that the people who need to be there will come and they will receive what they need from the workshop.” Repeating negative mental thoughts, together with the pressure to not fail, brought intense stress and unnecessary mental pain into my life all the way up until the workshop.
The workshop went very well.
The following week, however, I had a series of unpleasant events which seemed to culminate in the loss of my wallet. I wondered what was happening to me. I immediately posed this question to my dreams and asked them to help me understand what was I missing.
I looked at the symbolic messages from my dreams and the things that were happening in my life and was finally able to decipher the message my subconscious was trying to send me. I realized that I had not been humble about the success of the workshop. I took most of the credit for myself without recognizing all the support I had from the other teachers at the studio who promoted my workshop, the support of my community who sent good thoughts my way and also the support from the greater force who guided the right people to attend. I didn’t take the time to sit and meditate in gratitude for all the help sent my way.
The day after this realization, I found my wallet. It had been in my house the whole time!
Instead of believing that the universe was playing a trick on me, I believe that my subconscious mind was trying to bring me to a place of awareness that I previously couldn’t see. The loss of my wallet was representing a loss of focused values within myself.
One of the first questions in the workshop that I had just finished teaching was “what needs to be healed”? This is what I really need to heal: I did not need to lose my wallet in order to make up for my lack of humility after the workshop. I needed to forgive myself without needing to punish myself- to be concious of my attitudes and learn from my mistakes.
Through the symbolic interpretation of the messages of my dreams and others events in my life, things started to make more sense. I became very aware of something that was restraining me from being free. I am now more aware of how difficult my subconscious mind can make my reality- even to the point of actually losing my physical things!
There are many types of pain. There is external, internal, that which is brought by others, and that which we bring on ourselves. They are all difficult and they all hurt. But they can also teach things, about life, about limits, about taking care of ourselves and about practicing gratitude.
Perhaps the most complicated of the types of pain is the kind we bring on ourselves- the kind that is so often created by our subconscious mind. Self inflicted pain often shows itself in the form of useless stress and mental turmoil that we so naturally create in our own lives. Fortunately, we always have the option to examine this pain conciously and to grow in the process.
For more information about interpreting your dreams, join us for our next Dream Yoga Workshop.
Spaces are limited and the last workshop was full–you can contact us to reserve your space in advance.